Monday, January 26, 2009

Dating in the Second City....



The first date. Like testing the water in the hot tub to make sure you don't burn your toes before you can actually enjoy the experience.

There are perks to first dates. Both of you can blindly believe the other is perfect. You can pretend that they possess all the positive traits of your exes and absolutely none of the negative.

There are also realities to first dates. Let's all be honest. You can be a nice person and still admit... you are looking for their little bit of crazy. Everyone has it. My theory is that people just end up with the person whose crazy they can live with... and that crazy might even be admirable or cute after awhile. Or, even worse, you might start believing it's normal.

Eeekk. Eeeek. Eeek.

Then there's just the crazy that is absolutely not acceptable past a date or two. I've met and dated a couple of those fellas. To name a few...

I've been out with the crazy that...

**Thought that it was okay to make negative racial AND religious comments at all... let alone during the first date.
**Considered a crowded frat party a suitable Valentine's Day date.
**Just didn't blink. Try talking to someone and not blinking. It will immediately freak the other person out. Just try it.
**Invited me to a party... then ignored me and made out with someone else.
**Found out he was his ex-girlfriend's baby's daddy.... which prohibited a second date (which, given the circumstances, could have ended up much like the last point).
**Took on the persona of Superman/Clark Kent when comparing his sober and drunk personalities. In case you're not following, Superman was Romeo. Mr. Kent turned out of control party boy... and while standing 5-feet away took another girl's phone number.

Really, after digging up all those wonderful memories, I might as well start writing Valentine's Day cards for Hallmark. Just kidding. I'll stop...If I go on, I may become a lesbian... And although there's nothing wrong with lesbians, I'm still going to stop.

All this said, you would never guess, but I actually did go on a good first date...leading to a second. And I guess my point to all this rambling is... I haven't found his crazy yet.

And that. is. scary.

I've also been in relationships where the crazy doesn't come out for a few months... and by then you're in rationalizing mode because you're in too deep. Everyone should be completely crazy transparent. Or transparent in their craziness. You get it.

I'm enacting the Scarlet C on all Chicago singles. And the "C" doesn't stand for Chicago.

So in the meantime, I'm going to naively convince myself he's 100 percent normal... and beaten the odds of 20-something boys. Since he's technically living his 30th year... maybe moving on to a new bracket of men will surprise and impress me.

Only time will tell.

But, to be honest, the crazies are WAY more fun to discuss, so dish your craziest dates/exes?? I can't get enough of these stories...

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